Friday, February 15, 2013
Monday, December 17, 2012
Sandy Hook Tragedy
I apologize right now, but this will be an extremely long post . I urge you to read it all the way through though.
We live in a day and age where our children are becoming the victims of senseless acts of violence and murder. Why ? Why do people target such innocent lives? Why do THEY not get a chance to live a healthy, happy, normal life anymore? It's a sad day when you wake up and send your children off for the day , not knowing if they will make it home that day because of so many monsters in this world who kill our futures, our beautiful happy children.
There are indeed monsters living every where, adults killing babies, adults taking away the very life they created, but also monsters stealing away the lives of children that have not had a chance to make the change the future so desperately needs. No chance for them at all. Monsters like Adam Lanza are to blame, who knows if it was how he was raised, or if he had mental issues (which to do something like that to children for no reason he would HAVE to be insane) What he did to those who were slain in Sandy Hook Elementary, was beyond sick, beyond a tragedy, It was in itself a historical defiling of our senses, of our children, ROBBING them of their futures. THAT is the worst part, they will never get to grow up, never get to do the things their destinies had proclaimed for them. Who knows what they could have been. Poor Jack Pinto could have been in the NFL for all his love of football.
Emilie Parker was described as being a happy child. Her energy would seem to light up a room. She was bright, who knows if she could have been the one that the world needed to cure cancer, or aids, or find a way to make greener living more affordable and cost effective ? No one will ever know now because the MONSTER has taken those lights from this world. A little girl, always so happy, always so cheerful, her parents never being able to see her face light up on Christmas morning.
The actions of that MONSTER are sick and vile and disgusting!! Yet we as a whole nation are immortalizing him for his actions. We are giving him exactly what he wanted !! We are going to remember him for the monster he was, and yet the children will be forgotten in time, just as we did with the victims of the Columbine shooting, the shooting at Virginia Tech, and so many more! Those victims should be the ones we always remember. The people who were senselessly murdered in a place where they thought it would be safe! Our schools!!
How is it that our schools were raped of their security so easily ?? How did they manage to get in WITHOUT being stopped before lives could be taken? If our schools are supposed to be where we invest in our future, how is it that it is there, that we lose our futures? How does one dressed in full battle detail even get inside ?? Yes, sure, we have signs saying weapons are not allowed on campus.. but as you can see that didn't stop them! Our schools are unsafe and we send our children there every single day ! We need to beef up security, we need to have it where NO one can get inside without passing first a police officer's station that is armed to the teeth! We need metal detectors, and our teacher's need to be trained to handle situations like this so it does not happen again !
There are mothers who are grieving because we did not protect our schools. Fathers who would do anything to protect their children who could do NOTHING to protect them that day because schools are supposed to be the one safe place our children could be! We should demand that more protective orders be implemented in our schools so that our children may have a future and so that so many mothers and fathers not be robbed of their children or family .
I think that we as a nation don't show the love necessary in order to prevent people from doing things like this either. We have so many bullies and so many people who torment others for their own personal superiority that makes so many people feel like they are nothing, that they are losers and doing these vile acts will get them noticed. If we could just dish out the love as much as we do the hatred and the judgement I'm sure that this will happen less. Do I think that this will happen? No, I don't because we are too caught up in our own lives, our own problems, our own feelings of insufficiency that we still have to bring others down to feel better about ourselves. Open your eyes America! Do you see what you have caused?? Is this enough for you ?? Do more children have to lose their lives for you to feel better? You make me sick! I and other people in this country NO THIS WORLD are losing faith in humanity. What happened to love your neighbor? What happened to people caring for each other regardless of who you are, regardless of what you could do for them? Good will has left this world . All that is left is the few who still care for others and those who just don't care about anyone but themselves. When will you wake up and see that this is caused by YOU (and by you I mean the bullies in this world, the ones who must drag every one else down with them)
I know there will be people protesting our gun rights once again, but seriously you have to understand this. No, guns do not kill people, its the hand that is pulling the trigger. Every weapon is deadly but can be safe if given to the right people. If you still want to argue that guns should be illegal, well criminals or the criminally insane don't bother to worry about the law. All that will do is make it to were we cannot protect ourselves should another situation arise. Guns should be regulated as much as medicines, and credit, you have to go through several background checks in order to buy a car as well as to drive it . You have to have a clean background to apply for a job even. I bet those who are rallying against guns don't know you could kill someone with a penny. How is that possible? Well stand on top of a tall building and let it rain down. You could split someone in half with a quarter and they wouldn't even see it coming . You could kill a hundred people with just a dollars worth of pennies from there. Will you try and get coins taken away ? I didn't think so . You could kill someone with a fork. Yeah, an eating utensil. Will you have those removed from the home? Probably not. I don't care for guns, but I know that they are essential for protection.
Getting back on subject at hand, the tragedy of the innocent victims. I have cried many hours for the loss of your lives, and have felt so much anger and grief though I did not lose a single family member to this. I know no one who was lost that day , but I grieve for you , for the lives you will not have , for the families who are hurting, and the lights that were extinguished that never burned at their brightest yet . All of the little darlings who were lost, you will never be forgotten, not by me . The teachers who were heroes that day , Victoria Soto who died while protecting her class, who lied to the monster to get him to leave her classroom, she will always be remembered. My tears, my grief, my love you all will always have. If the world will not honor you , I will regardless. It may not be much to the families, it may not be acknowledged, I don't care, what I care , is that your memories, your lives will live on in at least one other person.
To the families who lost someone that day , my heart goes out to you, in condolence, in sympathy, and in grief.
My point with this blog post , is this:
1. Love more (Less people feeling suicidal and or like nothing and like no one cares)
2. Regulate WHO can own a gun, and How accessible they are
3. Implement STRICT safety procedures at schools (Who can even get past the front door, have police guarding the hallways and doors, have background checks on all teachers, and staff, as well as students, implement a STRICT zero tolerance for bullying)
4. Remember the victims don't remember the monsters
5. Love your child , teach them what to look out for, teach them not to bully, punish when they do .
1. Anne Marie Murphy 52 years old
2. Madeline F. Hsu 6 years old
3.Rachel Davino 29 years old
Remember these victims. Strive to better secure our future because without them, we have no hope for tomorrow.
We live in a day and age where our children are becoming the victims of senseless acts of violence and murder. Why ? Why do people target such innocent lives? Why do THEY not get a chance to live a healthy, happy, normal life anymore? It's a sad day when you wake up and send your children off for the day , not knowing if they will make it home that day because of so many monsters in this world who kill our futures, our beautiful happy children.
There are indeed monsters living every where, adults killing babies, adults taking away the very life they created, but also monsters stealing away the lives of children that have not had a chance to make the change the future so desperately needs. No chance for them at all. Monsters like Adam Lanza are to blame, who knows if it was how he was raised, or if he had mental issues (which to do something like that to children for no reason he would HAVE to be insane) What he did to those who were slain in Sandy Hook Elementary, was beyond sick, beyond a tragedy, It was in itself a historical defiling of our senses, of our children, ROBBING them of their futures. THAT is the worst part, they will never get to grow up, never get to do the things their destinies had proclaimed for them. Who knows what they could have been. Poor Jack Pinto could have been in the NFL for all his love of football.
Emilie Parker was described as being a happy child. Her energy would seem to light up a room. She was bright, who knows if she could have been the one that the world needed to cure cancer, or aids, or find a way to make greener living more affordable and cost effective ? No one will ever know now because the MONSTER has taken those lights from this world. A little girl, always so happy, always so cheerful, her parents never being able to see her face light up on Christmas morning.
The actions of that MONSTER are sick and vile and disgusting!! Yet we as a whole nation are immortalizing him for his actions. We are giving him exactly what he wanted !! We are going to remember him for the monster he was, and yet the children will be forgotten in time, just as we did with the victims of the Columbine shooting, the shooting at Virginia Tech, and so many more! Those victims should be the ones we always remember. The people who were senselessly murdered in a place where they thought it would be safe! Our schools!!
How is it that our schools were raped of their security so easily ?? How did they manage to get in WITHOUT being stopped before lives could be taken? If our schools are supposed to be where we invest in our future, how is it that it is there, that we lose our futures? How does one dressed in full battle detail even get inside ?? Yes, sure, we have signs saying weapons are not allowed on campus.. but as you can see that didn't stop them! Our schools are unsafe and we send our children there every single day ! We need to beef up security, we need to have it where NO one can get inside without passing first a police officer's station that is armed to the teeth! We need metal detectors, and our teacher's need to be trained to handle situations like this so it does not happen again !
There are mothers who are grieving because we did not protect our schools. Fathers who would do anything to protect their children who could do NOTHING to protect them that day because schools are supposed to be the one safe place our children could be! We should demand that more protective orders be implemented in our schools so that our children may have a future and so that so many mothers and fathers not be robbed of their children or family .
I think that we as a nation don't show the love necessary in order to prevent people from doing things like this either. We have so many bullies and so many people who torment others for their own personal superiority that makes so many people feel like they are nothing, that they are losers and doing these vile acts will get them noticed. If we could just dish out the love as much as we do the hatred and the judgement I'm sure that this will happen less. Do I think that this will happen? No, I don't because we are too caught up in our own lives, our own problems, our own feelings of insufficiency that we still have to bring others down to feel better about ourselves. Open your eyes America! Do you see what you have caused?? Is this enough for you ?? Do more children have to lose their lives for you to feel better? You make me sick! I and other people in this country NO THIS WORLD are losing faith in humanity. What happened to love your neighbor? What happened to people caring for each other regardless of who you are, regardless of what you could do for them? Good will has left this world . All that is left is the few who still care for others and those who just don't care about anyone but themselves. When will you wake up and see that this is caused by YOU (and by you I mean the bullies in this world, the ones who must drag every one else down with them)
I know there will be people protesting our gun rights once again, but seriously you have to understand this. No, guns do not kill people, its the hand that is pulling the trigger. Every weapon is deadly but can be safe if given to the right people. If you still want to argue that guns should be illegal, well criminals or the criminally insane don't bother to worry about the law. All that will do is make it to were we cannot protect ourselves should another situation arise. Guns should be regulated as much as medicines, and credit, you have to go through several background checks in order to buy a car as well as to drive it . You have to have a clean background to apply for a job even. I bet those who are rallying against guns don't know you could kill someone with a penny. How is that possible? Well stand on top of a tall building and let it rain down. You could split someone in half with a quarter and they wouldn't even see it coming . You could kill a hundred people with just a dollars worth of pennies from there. Will you try and get coins taken away ? I didn't think so . You could kill someone with a fork. Yeah, an eating utensil. Will you have those removed from the home? Probably not. I don't care for guns, but I know that they are essential for protection.
Getting back on subject at hand, the tragedy of the innocent victims. I have cried many hours for the loss of your lives, and have felt so much anger and grief though I did not lose a single family member to this. I know no one who was lost that day , but I grieve for you , for the lives you will not have , for the families who are hurting, and the lights that were extinguished that never burned at their brightest yet . All of the little darlings who were lost, you will never be forgotten, not by me . The teachers who were heroes that day , Victoria Soto who died while protecting her class, who lied to the monster to get him to leave her classroom, she will always be remembered. My tears, my grief, my love you all will always have. If the world will not honor you , I will regardless. It may not be much to the families, it may not be acknowledged, I don't care, what I care , is that your memories, your lives will live on in at least one other person.
To the families who lost someone that day , my heart goes out to you, in condolence, in sympathy, and in grief.
My point with this blog post , is this:
1. Love more (Less people feeling suicidal and or like nothing and like no one cares)
2. Regulate WHO can own a gun, and How accessible they are
3. Implement STRICT safety procedures at schools (Who can even get past the front door, have police guarding the hallways and doors, have background checks on all teachers, and staff, as well as students, implement a STRICT zero tolerance for bullying)
4. Remember the victims don't remember the monsters
5. Love your child , teach them what to look out for, teach them not to bully, punish when they do .
 |
| Mother of the monster he shot and killed her |
 |
| Jesse Lewis |
 |
| Allison Wyatt |
 |
| Avielle Richman |
 |
| Benjamin Wheeler |
 |
| Catherine Hubbard |
 |
| Chase Kowalski |
 |
| Daniel Barden |
 |
| Dylan Hockley |
 |
| Grace Mcdonnell |
 |
| Jack Pinto |
 |
| James Mattioli |
 |
| Josephine Gay |
 |
| Ana Marquez Greene |
 |
| Charlotte Bacon |
 |
| Emilie Parker |
 |
| Caroline Previdi |
 |
| Jessica Rekos |
 |
| Lauren Rousseau |
 |
| Noah Pozner |
 |
| Olivia Rose Engel |
 |
| Dawn Hochsprung |
 |
| Mary Sherlach |
 |
| Victoria Soto There are still some I was not able to find photos of , they are listed below |
2. Madeline F. Hsu 6 years old
3.Rachel Davino 29 years old
Remember these victims. Strive to better secure our future because without them, we have no hope for tomorrow.
Saturday, December 8, 2012
A missing "Star"
Today's blog is a sad one. A person I was close to, someone I looked up to as a mentor, a mother figure and close friend has said their final farewell.
She was a "Star" from the Heaven's fallen to Earth to brighten our lives, and make us cherish them more, she was a mother, a wife, a grandmother, a niece, aunt, cousin and best friend.
The main talent I knew her for OTHER than her great advice, the ear that was always ready to listen, or the shoulder always prepared for a cry, was her art. She was a painter. Her paintings were inspiring, and beautiful just as her soul was and I'm sure still is if you believe in the afterlife and Heaven and such .
I remember talking for hours on end mostly it was her consoling me or giving me advice on how to
make things better in my life, or to cut loose a dead end who was doing me wrong .
I will always always miss her smile, her warm and caring demeanor, the way she had at easily diffusing a
situation, her quirky outlook on life. The life lessons she taught me in just the short while I had a chance to really get to know her are invaluable. Her life had a special purpose while she may not have known it at the time. Her life was a beacon of light for others who were lost on their journey , she guided and cared and nurtured us as she found us.
She once told me about her past, full of trials , full of bad decisions that lead to her illnesses , but she never once was angry for what had happened, she accepted it , and lived with it as best as she could. That was true strength, true wisdom on her part . She even told me in our discussions that death was something she accepted, that she was ready and would be at peace when the pain was gone. Yes, we mourn her loss, but I accept her death. I feel as if by doing so it honors who she was, it honors her wishes and that, my dear readers to me is the best thing I feel I can do for her now. Honor her wishes, and live through the memories every day for the rest of MY life, and it will be as if she is still surrounding me with her light . In that , I shall be forever comforted , just knowing anytime I need her comfort all I have to do is think of her and her Star that is now missing from the Earth .
Star, I love you. You were always such a great friend and person to me and others , you will be sorely missed . I know you are better off now, but I still will miss you forever.
Love
jaded...
She was a "Star" from the Heaven's fallen to Earth to brighten our lives, and make us cherish them more, she was a mother, a wife, a grandmother, a niece, aunt, cousin and best friend.
The main talent I knew her for OTHER than her great advice, the ear that was always ready to listen, or the shoulder always prepared for a cry, was her art. She was a painter. Her paintings were inspiring, and beautiful just as her soul was and I'm sure still is if you believe in the afterlife and Heaven and such .
I remember talking for hours on end mostly it was her consoling me or giving me advice on how to
make things better in my life, or to cut loose a dead end who was doing me wrong .
I will always always miss her smile, her warm and caring demeanor, the way she had at easily diffusing a
situation, her quirky outlook on life. The life lessons she taught me in just the short while I had a chance to really get to know her are invaluable. Her life had a special purpose while she may not have known it at the time. Her life was a beacon of light for others who were lost on their journey , she guided and cared and nurtured us as she found us.
She once told me about her past, full of trials , full of bad decisions that lead to her illnesses , but she never once was angry for what had happened, she accepted it , and lived with it as best as she could. That was true strength, true wisdom on her part . She even told me in our discussions that death was something she accepted, that she was ready and would be at peace when the pain was gone. Yes, we mourn her loss, but I accept her death. I feel as if by doing so it honors who she was, it honors her wishes and that, my dear readers to me is the best thing I feel I can do for her now. Honor her wishes, and live through the memories every day for the rest of MY life, and it will be as if she is still surrounding me with her light . In that , I shall be forever comforted , just knowing anytime I need her comfort all I have to do is think of her and her Star that is now missing from the Earth .
Star, I love you. You were always such a great friend and person to me and others , you will be sorely missed . I know you are better off now, but I still will miss you forever.
Love
jaded...
 |
| My favorite photo of "Star" |
  |
| One of my Favorite done by "Star" |
Wednesday, December 5, 2012
Supple Starlets
Good evening readers!
Have you heard about the HOTTEST new modeling site?
This company is lead by none other than Brightan Shiny!
IN CASE you didn't already know who she was (which let's be honest, there's no way you haven't!)
This was one of her hottest shoots during the summer!
Now that you see her , you know right?
Well Miss Brightan Shiny has opened up her OWN site
and starting THIS week I will be doing interviews with all the newest models.
SOOO
BE SURE TO KEEP AN EYE ON MY UPDATES :D
You won't regret it !!
When you need beauty in your life, REACH for the stars <3
Have you heard about the HOTTEST new modeling site?
This company is lead by none other than Brightan Shiny!
IN CASE you didn't already know who she was (which let's be honest, there's no way you haven't!)
This was one of her hottest shoots during the summer!
Now that you see her , you know right?
Well Miss Brightan Shiny has opened up her OWN site
and starting THIS week I will be doing interviews with all the newest models.
SOOO
BE SURE TO KEEP AN EYE ON MY UPDATES :D
You won't regret it !!
When you need beauty in your life, REACH for the stars <3
Friday, October 12, 2012
My story of Self Hatred to Self Love
I wanted to share with you something of my past, something that would hopefully help women out there, old or young. These pictures are of a teenage Pagan Goddess. I was at the youngest 15 in these pictures and at the oldest I was 18. These photos are from a time in my life I would like to forget, but it's an essential part of my life. It made me who I am today .
These photos represent the old me. The one where I absolutely hated myself. The one who was too "fat" to be beautiful, who would never fall in love with someone who could love her back. I had many names for myself at this point in my life. I was cow, hippo, ugly, elephant, marshmallow, any horrible fat related name you could think of I had called myself that at least a dozen times. I hated my rolls, I would cringe every time I looked in the mirror and cry when I forced myself to. Yes, these pictures are of me smiling, but all but one are fake. The smile in the middle. That was a genuine smile because of my friends . They always got my mind off of how ugly I was. How worthless I always felt, to the point where I was constantly depressed, constantly thinking about how no one would miss me if I killed myself. I tried a few times, the first time, nobody noticed. That made it even worse, I began cutting, I begin punching walls, skipping school because I didn't want to be around the kids who made fun of me for being over weight. My class mates would make oinking sounds, mooing sounds, and beeping sounds like a large vehicle backing up. I was fatty fatty 2x4, I was big Bertha. I had people play jokes on me , coming on to me so I would like them , and when they thought I had fallen for them they would break up with me and tell me you fat bitch I could never love you . Why don't you lose some weight, even singing the Jenny Craig song to me, telling me I needed slim fast. Hell people who were supposed to be my friends when they got angry with me , they would do the same things. I learned to never trust anyone when I was in school. It always led to tears. I felt that all of it was rooted around to my being overweight. I starved myself sometimes but I would always lose the will power when I got too hungry and I would eat . I would yell at myself while nourishing my body, telling myself "you fat bitch, you couldn't diet to save your life, you will never be skinny, so therefore you will never be happy , you should just die, just fucking kill yourself and get it over with, so I would try, and I would chicken out. Of course I would berate myself for being a coward and not being able to go through with it. You fat bitch , you can't even kill yourself right. Everything went back to me being fat. Now, I laugh at myself, seeing how incredibly stupid I was. I am much larger now than when I was in school, and I love me. I love my curves, I love how I have these awesome killer breasts, and a booty that makes men pant and beg, hell even women do. No, I'm no where near conceited, I'm just going on actual experiences. I may be over 350 pounds, but I love me for me. It was a hard journey, with lots of tears, lots of anger and pain , but after wards I accepted myself, accepted that no one is perfect. That is what makes a person. Their individuality makes them perfect in their own way, there is no set norm for perfect. I don't have to look like a stick figure in order to feel beautiful. I can look in the mirror and say to my reflection. Hello beautiful, and mean it.
I no longer hate my body. I accept every roll, every flabby part of my skin, my thunder thighs, my jiggly butt, because you know what? I am me. I am the me-est me that will ever be, and no one could be a better me than me. In my imperfections and flaws, I myself am perfect too . You don't have to be a size 6 to be beautiful. I am a size 28 and I am beautiful in my skin. You don't realize that those kids in school at the time , hated their own selves, so they had to take it out on someone who had it worse than they did. Now those very kids are friendly, they want forgiveness, they want to be friends they want to be near someone who has the confidence they wished they had. Someone who can be happy even if they aren't what society thinks is beautiful.
Who cares what society thinks? FUCK Society. It doesn't own me. I am my own person. I can feel how I want to feel, I can dress how I want to dress, and be who I want to be. I don't have to be fake, I don't have to be small to feel pretty. Once you have that mentality, you, yourself can over come the vile hatred you feel about your body image. That is the ONLY way to overcome your lack of self love. I'm not saying it won't be hard, believe me , this will be one of the hardest spiritual journeys you will EVER undertake. Once you can get through it though, you will be so much happier. The first step is staring in the mirror, every day . Look at your body. Stare at it. Step out of YOUR mindset , and look at it from someone else's eyes. Someone who loves your body. Think of what they love about it. Try to imagine that it is beautiful. Wear something that accentuates that part of your body that you loathe the most, dress it up and remind yourself that it is you, it is beautiful. You won't start accepting it right off. I had to work for years, my self hatred was so bad. When you can objectively look at your body , and smile, or at least not think of yourself as nasty... welcome to step two. Step two do some photoshoots, before you can think to delete them . Post them. Do your make up, do your hair, make yourself dolled up but please you don't need to cake the make up on, and smile, remember that a smile is the most beautiful curve a woman has. Take the photos, don't judge it , don't delete it , post it some where like on facebook (which is what I did) and breathe.. always remember to breathe through the nerve wracking time. Watch the compliments pour in. Don't let the negative comments get to you , there will always be someone out there who still hates themselves and needs to bring others down. Be above that and look over it . Focus on the positive.. do this a few times a month, you will actually have FANS. Sounds crazy doesn't it ? That's what I thought as well.
My Dear reader, I wish you the most luck on your soul journey, I hope that my story, my advice helps you on your path. Please remember, that no matter what any one says though, no one can truly love you until you learn to love yourself. I implore you to love yourself, to make those changes necessary to allow yourself to feel beautiful, (or handsome if you are a guy)
I love you ,
Pagan Goddess
Thursday, October 4, 2012
Thursday, September 20, 2012
she is a strong woman beyond words. I've known her for a while
now and never has she appeared weak, even when the situation
would have brought most people to their knees, she stood tall and
never let anything defeat her. I admire her strength, her positivity
and how she doesn't let something like this affect who she is . In her
I see grace, (even though she is a klutz and she will agree with me there)
dignity, a strength like no other, and above all, love inside her. She is the
most amazing woman I've met in a long time. Her kind natured heart does get
broken once in a while, but still she perseveres. She is one of my closest friends,
and at one time we were together, I love her still, but I know she is doing what she
needs to in order to better her health and her mind. She is a mother, a daughter, a friend,
a sister, and a model. She has quirks, she has weirdness and beauty. That is what makes
her stand apart from all the rest. Her unique view on life blasts her out of this orbit with
the rest of us. May her cure work, and she continue to wow the pants off of everyone
for many many years to come.
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